Thursday, October 05, 2006

Petty Irritants

And now the airing of petty irritants:

1) Its curious that the current Foley scandal is really going to hurt the republicans in the upcoming midterm US elections. Its a picture perfect encapsulation of the bizarre tango with Americas number one dance duo: Sex and Violence. The war in Iraq hardly dampens the spirits of American voters as much as a sex scandal. A nod to America's lingering Puritanical roots and violent origins. CNN enjoys a feeding frenzy over this issue while the War in Iraq was initiated under false pretense and has cost the US over 300 billion dollars (see ticker under the archives) Add this scandal to the 20 billion dollars of missing reconstruction contract money that barely makes the papers. Add this scandal to virtually all American intelligence reports explaining how the current foreign policy has made the US less safe while the administration claims the exact opposite. Add this scandal to the colossal ineptness dealing with hurricane Katrina. Add this to the unconscionable practice of characterizing all objections to public policy as being a boon to terrorism or soft on terror and the like. This is a grotesque insult to dialogue and certainly a slap in the face of the very freedom that so far 2700 Americans have gave their lives supposedly defending. And Yet: It will likely be a bland sexual advance that will tip the scales at the polls this November. Yes, it is tempting to connect the Republican's twisted, repressed sexuality in all this, their medieval attitude towards gays and lesbians and their unwavering, self-imposed responsibility of being America's moral compass. But alas, young boys have their admirers going all the way back to the toga-clad Academy and so I can only blame the Republicans for their cowardly cover up.
Among many other sins.

2) The guy who does the voice over work for CTV. I really loathe affectation. There's also something rather distasteful about using the same faux drama affectation for doing a plot summary of Grey's Anatomy and then using the same voice for the news lead in. Its as though CTV has just given up trying to pretend they separate entertainment from news. On second thought, maybe I prefer that kind of honesty.

3) 20% of drivers on 11th and 12th Aves SW in Calgary. They're both 2-lane and every time I want to cross (its always very busy) some chowderhead who clearly never walks anywhere, slows down and stops then looks at me with consternation wondering why I don't cross blindly into the next lane only to be struck by the other lane of traffic that hasn't stopped. For the love of god, just drive past, I may be crippled but I'm not retarded!

4) And speaking of cars, the Harper government is contemplating the very strict California emissions for Canadian cars which I naturally applaud. Buzz Hargrove (isn't he dead yet) was seen in many a media scrum this week in tears crying that the industry couldn't possibly meet this new demand. So did I just dream that in the mid seventies there was a realization the oil was a scarces resource and that pollution was choking our cities? It must have been a dream since that would mean the auto industry would have had 30 years to realize that the way they make cars was as dead as the V8. Surely that last 10 years of talking about Kyoto wasn't translated into the language of slumbering oligiopic-ese.

5) The Liberal party of Canada. What are you guys thinking anyway. Lets be honest, the only thing that is of concern in the next election is ensuring that that Liberal party at least appears to be moving slightly to the right so that it can steal votes away from the conservatives. Clearly Bob Rae doesn't fit the bill for this reason. I may like him more but lets not be trapped by the personality myth here. It is rare leaders that swing voters to them. Rather you must place yourself where the voters are. Mike Ignatief is better ideologically placed.
I guess though at the end of the day I couldn't really care who they pick because it makes no difference anyway. Frankly unless I read the paper, I can't tell by any of my five senses who runs this country.


I can assure you that my petty irritants are a resource, that while governed by thermodynamics, are nearly inexhaustible. If anyone can figure out how to harness this energy, I will gladly sell it back to the grid and split the profits. Unfortunately the same cannot be said of patience, and so I shall close.

2 comments:

rainswept said...

Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.

I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you.

I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a... fraid. Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 12th of January 1992. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it I can sing it for you.

It's called "Daisy."

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage, I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle built for two.

captainorange said...

Nice Dave, I think you could give Rex a run for his money